Wednesday, August 1, 2012

WiLL I JuSt GoT tO Be FRee............

        Well Guest "Who" I Have today from the Past Another Oldies but Goodies!
                          "Stephanie Mills" and her song: "FREE"

    I want women to know, it's okay to declare your freedom, many women feel that if they are not with a man it's a problem with who they are, but that's not really the truth!  Sometimes we have to be a little selfish and be F_R_E_E  from everything that can hold us back and stop us from moving forward in life.  I am not saying that a Man isn't an important factor but if a woman is alone it's completely okay to live and enjoy your freedom without a man by your side.
    It has been times in my own life, when I myself chose to be Free other than being in a relationship, mainly because I didn't feel I had the right person in which I would have been willing to sacrifice my time in order to fulfill a positive relationship. Do I regret it No, because If you know that there is something missing then why place yourself with someone you are not completely happy with!

                         Often times Women will opt for a person who they KNOW can never
make them remotely happy just to say they HAVE a man. But WHAT does the statement "I Have a Man" really mean Nowadays?  Is it he's the man in your life, with a commitment and not a bunch of drama or Is it he's the man you are having Sleeping Parties with?  We as women must understand what we want may not be what we are getting. If you are a women who really want a committed relationship, why do you keep going on endless boring dates? Stop saying things like well "Until Mr. Right Comes" I guess I will kick it with Sam, John, or Mark.  And If you are really sure about what you expect in a man why is it you can't take yourself off the market and wait? Let's Address this as well Sisters, Internet dating is still dating! Instead now you are dating men online other than meeting that same man from the streets so it does count even though many you will never meet. Also Many Women have declared they are not dating but still have a man they are in contact with SOMEWHERE on this planet.  Why do we as women continue to PLAY ourselves?
Or should I say why are we so afraid at the Ideal of being "FREE"?

  What does this word "Free" means not imprisoned or enslaved, not controlled by obligation or the will to another: felt free to go.

 Now the purpose of this Blog is to set the record straight about being "FREE".  Many women who are not in a committed relationship with their Male friends act like they are enslaved and imprisoned to that person while he is running around "Free to go".  This behavior is why many women are unmarried and are chained to a man who will never marry them.  I watched this happen to many of my friends and family they had the "HOLD on a Man syndrome" even when the straps had already burst right before their eyes.  I too have made this mistake but I didn't keep the man, finally I had to return him back to his inhabitation. I hope that if you are reading this blog you began to get the courage to welcome your FREEDOM!

 Freedom comes with many benefits, you can go and come as you please without anyone trying to stop and control you, you have all day to pick one thing whether your hair,nails,shop,wash clothes, take the kids places they probably haven't been only because you couldn't go with worrying about when he will be back, or if you tried to go he would call you or not call you and upset your whole day. You can pick a career,church,friends you want to be surround by instead of always having to do things he like or else you will be banded from alot of fun things you use to enjoy! You can also work on you and get some of your lifelong dreams accomplished where your family and yourself can begin to benefit from. Yes, you may have to give up the passion, for a moment but God will Bless your life in doing so.

 Now if you are with someone who makes you happy for the most part and you enjoy the balance you have in your relationship I don't encourage you to cut them off. But this is for women who are enslaved or imprisoned and have to be controlled by the person they love the most. Plain and simple, It's not a HEALTHY thing to ever love another person more than you love yourself or MORE THAN LIFE ITSELF because LIFE IS A GIFT FROM GOD TO YOU!  No person should be given that amount of Love to withstand a positive relationship!


* Both people are considered equal
* Both people expectations should be met by one another
* Both people are Committed to one another and not other people
* Both people intention is to help you and not harm you if you do something wrong
* Both people do take for grant you kindness,wisdom, and faithfulness
* Both people agree with each person need acceptable amount of space to pursue their own dreams
* Both people are supportive to one another
* Both people agree to each others life plan, such as child, careers, environment and lifestyles
* Both people respect and have release their past relationships, & friendships with ex's to remain civil
* Both people will take responsibilities serious, such as house work, cars, and share material goods
* Both people take care of the children whether working out of the home or in the home
* Both people are mature enough to raise the children in a sound environment without abuse
* Both people agree and respect the religious upbringing and doesn't hinder their beliefs

If you do not see any of this going on in your relationship you are in an abusive environment and you are being imprisoned and enslaved by another person.  Though for many this list can be continued  but this list really allows you to see why the relationship or friendship is going down the drain because it lacks structure. In everything we do God intended us to live in a structure environment where we can maintain and take care our families without the cares of this life.  Yes, He knows we will have trials and  tribulations and this shall be from the world and it's day to day agenda but it should not be within our homes we live in and if quarreling is their it shouldn't continue to disturb the home live it should cease after the problem is resolved. Our Children should have peace and not have to be a parent at twelve, because the adults are not able to maintain their own responsibilities.

   I recommend you listen to Stephanie Mills video "Free" because she only reminds us that it's nothing wrong with declaring your FREEDOM and making a decision to just be you! This is a right you was given and if you need time to do you, then do so and stop allowing your circumstances to imprison and destroy you!  May your choices lead you to your destiny and purpose here on earth.  Have a Wonderful day Everyone!

     Please don't forget to rate or comment! I enjoy writing and would enjoy your feedback as well.

By: Sisterhoods Bookclub
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Tuesday, July 31, 2012


Hello: Friends,

The Topic "Knowing Who You Are"  is a very common factor for everyday Living!

Making Sense of Who you are! Everyone is always whispering inside someone ear about you as you walk throughout the Halls, or Inside of your Church or While getting into you car, or While you enter a party or special event but what are they saying about YOU?  Isn't that interesting how everybody is sharing their opinions about who you are other than yourself?

 Today is your Day to find out "Why are you So Interesting".  From the beginning of time I really believe that there were what I call "GUPPIES".  A GUPPY searches for Important about other people without backing up the information they've received about others and they use A EAR HUSTLER to go Ask you about the information they heard to get you to confirm there facts. Guppies are the ones who spread the information to the Ear Hustlers. And most of the time a Ear Hustler can be someone you may already know but thing they would never betray you.  If so think again! Many Guppies are always ready to send untimely, incorrect information throughout the airways to try and mess your reputation up and credibility up among others. What I've learned is Guppies Lives in larger environments such as churches,businesses,state agencies,schools, anywhere people are flocked by the numbers there will be a pool of guppies. 

How do they find Ear Hustlers? They find those who are not popular and people who do not know who they are.  People they can use to just plant around a person who they seek to destroy.  And in some cases Ear Hustlers want to obtain popularity and lack their own Independence and they are willing to gain it at any expense and that is how they are selected. The Guppies are always controlled by a GUPPY LEADER who will send the small guppies out to spread the lies and destroy others life once the Ear Hustlers have conducted their assignment! BUT what most "EAR HUSTLERS" do not know they will be the one alone who will take the fall with the person who is being attacked. All the Guppies will swim away, that is why they are never found and still in high demand.  So if you didn't know you do now, there is a Ear Hustler sitting among your group of friends. How I know, Let you do anything stupid you will see how fast that news will travel.

        She's been sent to get the scoop from you so she can go share it with others! Look at those eyes she been taught not to let on to who she is!

Testimony:  "A Friend and I was talking and she asked how had I achieved a particular goal? I told her "When we are able to get to know who we are, it just makes life a little easier. I begin to recognize what she said to me because this is how she said it: " Whatever you are doing it is noticeable to others"  this statement alone made me realize she was sent by the guppies to find out my Business.  We'll you know I kept it plain and simple!

What came across my mind was this many people don't even know "WHO THEY ARE AND HOW POWERFUL THEY CAN BE TO OTHERS." Below is a set of question you may want to ask yourself because you may have a lot of great qualities but have not become the person you are destined to be!

*Are you a Quitter everytime trouble comes your way?
*Is everyone the enemy and not yourself?
*Do the same people from your Childhood still taking up much of your Memory?
*Do you feel intimidated when others people get more attention than you do?
*Do you feel that everyone want you, but you are still not taken?
*Do you feel that everyone else problems are not as worst as yours?
*Do you always get mad when you witness others become successful of get something they want?
*Do you feel like Life has left you behind, nothing ever good happens for you?
*Do you feel like God is not in your corner?
*Do you feel like you've been cheated?
*Do you believe that you have to lie about everything to have friendships with people?
*Do you think you are not attractive?

                                       Change is Necessary..................................

   When a person feels deprived in everyday life matters this is a symbolic sign they have not reached a certain level of independence. Although they may have a Job, and a lot of wonderful things the facts are they cannot do anything without others approval. If this is the case they may go throughout their entire life allowing others to use them by concealing there true identity. God never intended for his people to allow other people to control there existence. In fact His total plan for a believer is to be totally dependent upon him and not man or ourselves. If you are having a problem with identifying who you are look below and see How you should be answering the same set of questions above.

   When we Know who we are we can no longer operate from the same mentality as before! When you can say this Word "YOU" without waivering then you can see things around you changed for you. But when we use the word " I Do Not FEEL" this means we have not gotten the assurance from within to move forward.  One should never rush at making lifelong decisions, but one should never totally depend on others to approve of them.


*You choose to never Quit until you see the RESULTS YOU WANT TO SEE
*You recognize you can sometimes become your own enemy from TIME TO TIME
*You refuse to hold onto Bad Memories that made you feel sad, and have discovered the New You
*You enjoy watching people because it only gives you new ideals how to step up your game
*You have learn that patience is a virtual, and you are content all by yourself
*You ARE not focused on problems only solutions
*Your familiar that season's come and go, so there's no reason to becoming bitter
*Your choices determines your outcome, you've decide to remain faith no matter what
*You can see evidence of God in Your life, and you know he's still in control
*You are not going to allow your circumstance to keep you down any longer you have stood your course
*You have learned friendships are fading, But GOD is forever by your side
*You have confidence in which you are reflecting beauty wherever you go,because beauty is skin deep

When we are having problems with our identity we will always have doubts about everything. When we know who we are we will always Recognize,Realize and Recommend that we are respected at all times.

Many studies have shown that many people are driven from a lack of fear than confidence. Maybe the answer is "BELIEVING IN WHO YOU, NO MATTER WHAT COMES YOUR WAY" because at the end of the day you are the only one who will live with the choices you've made over the course of your existence. As for others they will only witness what they've seen or heard about you and without out reasonable facts the Guppies of this World will continue to spread untimely and incorrect info to hurt other people but may be if you've been their Ear Hustlers you will find Independence and no longer allow yourself to be tricked into this cesspool of sin. 

I challenge everyone who will read this blog, to embrace "YOU" while you have a chance! And "lean not to your own understanding about everyday life things" If you never take the time to get to know who you are, How will you know what you can believe and what you cannot?

If this blog helped recharged your faith, then leave me a message! I really believe the world have tried to make many people bitter than set them Free. Tell me what you think?

By: Sisterhoods Bookclub
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On Twitter: 4VirtuousWomen